Find a Surrogate

When trying to find a surrogate, it’s important that you invite the right person onto your family-building journey. Although surrogacy can be a complex process that involves legal, financial, and emotional matters, you will always have us as experienced professionals to guide you through every step of the way.

How to Find a Surrogate?

Many parents may not have envisioned surrogacy as an option when planning to have a child. Couples may have decided to use a surrogate after a long journey of trying on their own to conceive. Surrogacy provides couples the opportunity to have the child they’ve always wanted finally. Before finding a surrogate, though, intended parents are encouraged to educate themselves on the subject. The industry can be complex to navigate through, and some may not know where to begin.

How can you and your partner find the ideal partner for your surrogacy experience? Read on to learn more about the different types of surrogacies and what you can expect in your search for a surrogate. 

What is a Surrogate?

A surrogate is a woman chosen to carry a child for a couple or an intended parent. There are various reasons why intended parents choose surrogacy. Couples who decide to utilize a surrogate do so due to fertility issues, risks, or are a LGBTQ+ partnership.

Intended parents can select from two different surrogacy categories: traditional and gestational.

Traditional surrogacy means that there is a genetic link between the intended parent and the child. For example, if the intended parent is a same-sex couple, the man can provide his sperm to fertilize the surrogate’s egg. Couples who partake in a traditional surrogacy experience must seek legal counsel to ensure their rights.

Unlike traditional surrogacy, in gestational surrogacy, the surrogate has no genetic link to the child. Gestational surrogacy involves a surrogate carrying the egg of another woman. For heterosexual couples, a child’s whole genetic makeup can be linked entirely to them. This form of surrogacy is not only the most common type of surrogacy utilized, but this also grants absolute legal protection for both parents.

When to Consider Surrogacy?

Intended parents may consider surrogacy when they face challenges in conceiving or carrying a pregnancy. This option becomes especially relevant in cases of infertility, recurrent miscarriages, or when medical conditions make pregnancy risky, providing an alternative way for individuals or couples to start their path to parenthood. Below are some situations in which surrogacy may be considered:


Intended parents facing challenges with infertility, encountering difficulties in conception, and grappling with recurrent pregnancy loss may choose to seek the assistance of a surrogate.


Medical Conditions

Women facing specific medical conditions that raise the risk levels of pregnancy may consider surrogacy. In such cases, the well-being of both the mother and/or the fetus is at an increased risk, making surrogacy a safer alternative.


Same-Sex Couples

Same-sex couples, often male couples, may choose surrogacy if they desire to have a biological connection with their child. In cases with same-sex male couples, an egg donor is typically also involved.


Age-Related Challenges

Advanced maternal age can increase pregnancy risks for older couples and pose potential challenges in conception as well. Older couples may choose surrogacy as a proactive choice to prioritize the well-being of both the fetus and the mother.


Personal Choice

Some individuals or couples may choose surrogacy as a personal preference, even in the absence of medical reasons.

What to Consider Before Using a Surrogate

Surrogacy can be a tedious and time-consuming process. Before delving deep into surrogacy, there are a few essential aspects that intended parents must consider. The choices that you make will not only influence your surrogacy process but could also affect your future child.

Significant aspects to keep in mind before seeking a surrogate are:

  • Criteria for surrogate: Couples usually have standards on a surrogate’s physical characteristics, educational background, health history, and lifestyle prior to selecting. Another attribute to possibly consider is a surrogate’s past pregnancy history. Many couples prioritize understanding previous pregnancies and deliveries to gain insight into how well a surrogate carries a child. Common questions couples ask include, “Did the surrogate carry the child to full-term?”, “How well did the surrogate recover from the last delivery?” and “What types of deliveries have the surrogate endured (c-section or natural birth)?”.


  • The relationship with the surrogate: At times, what strikes a couple about a surrogate is not if they meet specific characteristics but how well they connect with their surrogate. Before, couples should establish what type of relationship they would want with the surrogate. The kind of relationship that is set between a surrogate and intended parents will potentially affect the frequency of communication and type of communication received (text, phone call, email).


  • Utilizing a surrogacy agency: The legal aspect, scheduling coordination, and communication between a surrogate and intended parents can be overwhelming. Agencies facilitate many services to save time and worry in the surrogacy process. Surrogacy agencies also have a wide range of surrogates that are comprehensively evaluated, and couples can be matched to a candidate to fit their search criteria. Agencies provide logistical support and act as a guide for couples new to surrogacy.

Selecting a Surrogate

Each couple is unique when determining what they are seeking in a surrogate. Even though there is not a set list of requirements that need to be met for each couple, it is still critical to keep a few factors in mind when selecting a surrogate.

Medical History

If a couple chooses a surrogate through an agency, they will already be cleared for any health risks. If a couple decides to search for a surrogate on their own accord, asking questions such as whether the surrogate ever suffered from any medical conditions would benefit the intended parents.


The location of your surrogate is something to consider. Depending on how involved you would like to be with the surrogate during the process. Setting expectations with your surrogate is important, so if you can't make appointments but would like photos or be on the phone during appointments, this can be arranged.


We follow ASRM guidelines of age 21-39 years old but there are special circumstances where a woman over that age could serve as a surrogate! As a woman ages, the risk of complications when carrying a child can increase, however, there are circumstances where 40-year-old women do serve as surrogates. The age of a surrogate will depend on the couple's surrogacy standards and comfortability level.


Most couples place much importance on the health of the surrogate. Intended parents are more at peace knowing that their surrogate is committed to a healthy diet and lifestyle. If the couple is comfortable enough and has come to an arrangement with the surrogate, they could make a special request for the surrogate to eat a specific diet.


The connection between a surrogate and a couple is vital. Meeting all of the requirements is not enough at times, and sometimes just one interaction will determine if a couple will want to proceed with a surrogate. In each surrogacy journey, many involved have stated that having respect and trust are key in solidifying a bond.

Benefits of Using a Surrogacy Agency

Surrogacy agencies are a complete in-house service that facilitates the surrogacy process. There are many benefits that couples obtain when using a surrogacy agency.

  • Screening and evaluation: When meeting with a surrogacy agency, couples can state the type of fertility candidate they seek. The agency can search within its surrogacy database and provide options for the intended parents. The coordinator will then schedule times when the couple can meet the surrogacy candidates. Intended parents are encouraged to take their time with the selection process to ensure they feel comfortable and confident with their choice.                                                                      
  • Legal counsel: It is necessary to retain legal counsel when following through with the surrogacy process. Protections and rights in surrogacy differ in each state. If couples are not well versed in surrogacy laws, the process can be intimidating and confusing to maneuver through. Agencies employ fertility lawyers who specialize in surrogacy. A surrogacy agency will coordinate a time and location for you to meet the surrogate to solidify all the legalities.
  • Additional arrangements: During the surrogacy process, couples and their selected surrogate must keep consistent communication to ensure the pregnancy is going well. With conflicting schedules, it can be challenging to coordinate times to meet for medical appointments or discuss and handle healthcare insurance policies. Coordinating schedules can also be problematic if the surrogate lives in a different area. An agency can ease this part of the surrogacy experience by administrating all appointments and time commitments for both parties.

Providing Clients with a Quality Surrogacy Experience

Options in Family strives to provide families with the best fertility experience possible. We offer a wide range of surrogacy programs for intended parents that include medical and psychological screening, customized matching, legal and financial counsel, schedule coordination, and more!

We believe in catering to everyone’s surrogacy requirements and aspire to fulfill the needs of every intended parent. Contact our team to learn more about the abundant surrogacy options that await you today!

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

Yes, under California Family Code 7962f, surrogacy agreements – contractual agreements between intended parents and surrogates aimed at securing parental rights for the intended parents – are enforceable in California as long as all necessary conditions are met and the agreement remains valid.

When intended parents assume parentage varies depending on the state. In California, under the Uniform Parentage Act, intended parents are permitted to establish their legal claim as parents before the child is born.

Surrogacy laws differ depending on the state. Under California law, intended parents are able to claim parentage, even if their surrogate is out-of-state, if at least one intended parent is a California resident.

Yes! Surrogacy is legal for all LGBTQIA+ couples in California. Under the Uniform Parentage Act, individuals who use assisted reproduction like surrogacy, are able to establish legal parentage.

Once matched with a surrogate, the egg and sperm the intended parent(s) provide will be used to make an embryo. The surrogate’s uterus is then prepared for implanting the embryo by taking medications that are either oral, injectable, or vaginal. Once the uterus is prepared, the embryo is then transferred to the surrogate’s uterus, where if successful, the surrogate will become pregnant.

There isn’t an exact duration of the surrogacy process. Multiple factors can affect how long the surrogacy process is, such as the matching process, medical examinations and screenings for the surrogate, and the amount of IVF cycles it may take.

How much interaction a surrogate has with the intended parents is determined mutually between the surrogate and the intended parents. Depending on the type of relationship intended parents may have with a surrogate, the amount of contact will vary. Usually, during the pregnancy, the intended parents and surrogate maintain regular communication, sharing important information about appointments and updates.

Find Your Surrogate